I'm Winter's Bitch

I love winter.  I love the snow and being able to wear sweaters, sweatshirts and hand knit scarves.  I love to sit inside all snuggly warm writing or reading while it's snowing like mad outside.  I used to have a snow globe that sat on my desk year round that was given to me as a gift because I'd once said that when it snows I'm happy and that person wanted me to be happy all of the time.  Sadly, the person who gave me that snow globe no longer cares about my happiness and I couldn't even tell you where the snow globe ended up.  LOL  But my point is that I always loved winter.

My driveway after the first big snow in December.

Now a days though winter and I don't exactly get along.  I still love the snow and all the crap I mentioned above.  But for the past couple of years I've been dealing with this weird mystery illness of mine that pretty much makes winter a living hell for me now.  When the temps are at freezing or below (it's 10 fucking degrees where I am right now.  Ten.) every joint in my body hurts.  I find it hard to do basically anything because everything hurts.  Walking, typing, standing up, lying down... everything.  It's like the cold seeps into my joints and freezes everything so that I'm like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz when he's all rusted up. 


I've been tested for Lupus, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Osteoarthritis and a bunch of other stuff but my doctor can't figure out why I have this pain.  It's definitely better when I'm warm and in warm weather, but even then I still deal with it.  Basically it sucks.  I have my good days and then my awful days.  Most days are somewhere in between where I'm good for a portion of the day and then it hits me and I feel like I'm about 90 years old.  Right now my back is screaming at me and my shoulders are so tensed up they feel like they're on fire.  It's ridiculous at my age to have so much pain, and yet I do.


So yeah, winter for me is a bit of a bittersweet thing.  On one hand I still love it and it still makes me smile, but on the other hand it literally hurts me.  I still get excited when I hear there's a big storm headed our way and when people who live here in the Mitten bitch about winter I roll my eyes because it annoys the fuck out of me.  I mean come on... sure it's annoying at times, but you live in Michigan!  It's going to get ass numbing cold here and you know it!  It's also going to snow here, so acting like it's the end of the freaking world because it's doing exactly what it's supposed to do in winter is just silly to me.  


I truly do love winter... I just hate what it does to my body.

This is the view from my bathroom... how can you not love that?